mom with three boys
(I copied a skateboarding add she was screaming at aliens)
My life is complicated and far from simple. In my dreams I have run away to a tropical island running a coffee/surf shack and enjoying the slow uncomplicated life of a surf bum/ evangelical. My reality is far away from my wishful dreams. I am a mom of three very busy and loving boys who demand my every attention. A husband who seems to work non-stop to create this amazing life of ours and travels more than he wants to. I have a heart exploding to be an artist, abolitionist,fashion designer, blogger, fabric creator, writer, teacher, evangelist, missionary, web designer, social media marketing guru, fitness expert…. Oh the list of things I want to be and do is so long even I get confused as to who I am this week. My days consist of craziness trying to keep this house clean, paperwork completed. I’ve got medical bills and medical paperwork growing rapidly from a wicker basket. Our orthopedic jokes that we should get a punch card. I wish we could, it would be nice to get the fourth cast free. My children want and need to be brought here and there for this and that. My husband needs his clothes ironed, picked up, dropped off, this person to call that person to make contact with. I must feed this crazy bunch who eats 164 eggs a week and three people on a body builder diet that consist of making and eating 6 meals each daily. Budgets to make and try to keep that on days makes me want to weep. School plays, summer swim meets, and all those other things that demand I know names of people I hardly ever see. The two friends I have most likely think I’m the worst if I ever get a chance I promised to call or text it just seems as if lately I’m very low on chances. I could continue the list with emails, mail, voicemail, and more. I could keep tell you about how I deal daily with the dog and how she poops in random places and the five-year old who says he went yet another “poop fart” in his pants. Or how about just in the last thirty days we have had: pathfinder break down and towed then re towed then fixed for 1500, a mini van spring a leak and cost 1000., how about the MacBook Pro that was stolen with all my husbands receipts he needs for compensation, the water bill being double for a leaky toilet, car insurance going up 100.00 a month, eye visit costing way more than we thought it would, IRS check bounced and cost some more fees. But to top it off we spent two hours looking through poppy wet wipes for a $1500 contacts that my son dropped. It just keeps pouring and raining and then hail here and there.
Enough with that shall I count my blessings? I have three wonderful, adorable, healthy (sometimes broken) children. Our gym has let my oldest in without paying and then gave us a huge discount to add him this month. Cody is finally cast free after three different cast just this year. We found the contacts thank you Lord. The pathfinder hit the dust and we are blessed enough to be able to lease a new car. The van is fixed and running. I still have my laptop and insurance is paying for a new one after we come up with the deductible. School is out and I have a summer to evangelize my children before giving them back to the school. We have food in our fridge and a roof over our heads. The list could go on and on to about how blessed we are. Especially if I think back to when we had nothing, absolutely nothing. A story for another time.
I have been over whelmed and crying out to the Lord. It has come down to this. I am his beloved and he cares for me. I have been set free. I have fasted blogging, art and everything to pray about what direction to go. I have so many blogs out there of things I have started and yet to finish. I love everything and can’t seem to focus on just one. I heard in my heart a question, ” What keeps you up at night and get’s you up in the morning?” I have been meditating on this. Here is what I have decided.
I can’t stop thinking and praying for those stuck in the sex traffic rings. Even though I am good at art,sewing, working out, decorating, producing and what ever I spend time learning about to me it is all lost. It is all a waste if I can’t save, rescue or help someone be set free. I am shutting down all but two blogs.
Fiber Lily will become a place for you to learn more about me and the King I serve. To see what craziness I am up to now and my next plan to conquer, save and change the world. I will be posting randomly and when I can. I love to share, teach, and dream. I love to spill out my feelings in words praying it touches someone or changes a life.
I will focus on www.Speakupforthem.com and build it, finish my book I’ve wanted to write and share with the world how you all can fight. I will focus on building my business and maybe finally making my first dollar. I will love my kids and spend time with my friends. I will spend more time on focusing on God and how I can reach out here instead of wishing I was on the beach or back in India with all my dear orphans.
Stay tuned for more craziness, art, fitness, love, laughter and tears. If you have a question or want to talk I am here.
Have an amazing crazy beautiful day.