Sunday was an interesting day full of emotions and wonderment. My living situation is turning out to be a huge stress in my life that will end on me moving once again on Dec 1st. Who moves in the middle of the holiday season? When most people are putting up a tree I will looking for a new home. I have been emotionally trying to grasp and understand situations and the actions of others in my life. I want so badly to trust those around me, yet I keep getting disappointed. Maybe that is why Jesus said to forgive over and over again. I think it’s 70×7. A number that none of us would ever want to get to for just one person.
Sunday I woke up feeling an urge to let it all out and paint like a wild crazy person. So after church I headed home with two extra teenagers in tow and broke out the paints. Only to find I needed more paint. Dragged all three teens, two kids and one husband to Michaels and then game stop and finally back home. Once I gathered all my supplies I broke out a huge drop cloth and made an easel against the porch outside. I started dripping and spraying and splattering paint everywhere. I don’t like how it turned out but, it was fun to play. Not everything works out. My living situation, my art, and most of the time my cooking. But, it’s what we learn in the process that grows us and turns us into the person we will become. How we choose to treat those around us. How we choose to react to the situations before us. Each action drives us to the destination of who you are becoming. We all have a choose to become the person you want to be.
So next time you want to call someone and chew them out. Think about what that action will make you. What place will that action bring you to. For the last few days I have struggled with wanting to make a phone call to a very “ugly” person in my life right now. This morning I dove into the word of God and found my secret happy place. “Lord bring happiness to your servant, I lift up my soul” Ps 86:4. When I find my self repeating in my head this phone call I now start repeating this verse. It calms me and brings me back to who I want to be.
Decide who you want to be. Then with each correct choice you make it will bring you one step closer to that goal. Don’t worry about when you don’t make the right choice. Just decide next time that you will.
Before I ruined it. But nothing is ever a total lost with art. That’s what I love about it.
I will just turn it into something beter. Just later.